When In Rome

So about a month ago I hit up Vegas (or VegASS as I affectionately call it) for a bachelorette party. It wasn't what I thought it would be but I'm okay with that because it was fucking phenomenol. I've already notified everyone that should I come down with a terminal disease, I am moving to Vegas to die. Why not move there now? Well, if I move there I will die within 365 days. So terminal disease...or if I'm not married by 40 and the shit starts to sag.


Anyway, while we were out there we signed up for the What Women Want pass of which we failed to take full advantage of because we had other shit we wanted to do. Seriously, actually, the thought of a penis waggling around in front of me while other women sit nearby is kind of disgusting. So, no, no American Thunder show for us. Though that was really just because we ran into a bachelor party and shenanigans occurred (including getting a guy arrested and getting kicked out of Planet Hollywood).

The best part of the package was a class called Stripper 101. While I didn't learn a damn thing because I was so hammered, it was a lot of fun and instilled a level of respect for those ladies climbing the poles. Damn, That. Shit. Is. Hard. Unfortunately for you and fortunately for me and the bachelorette, no pictures were allowed inside the class. Bitch who taught it was ripped and SKILLED. I did wonder, what is the shelf life of a stripper? She didn't seem very old but she wasnt a spring chicken either. The most upsetting thing was finding out Kendra was teaching the class two days later. I adore her and would have loved to hear that laugh in person.




I want a stripper pole in my apt now. We learned tricks to giving a lap dance (lights dim, lots of layers and a special move that doesn't involve groping your own breasts but teases a guy) plus twirling on the pole. Good lord, don't drink before you go! While it does loosen your inhibitions, it makes things far trickier than they should be. This was definitely a fun experience in Vegas but if you are looking to actually learn strip moves and get a workout this is not the class for you. Definitely look into classes like that though- they do AMAZING things for your body. This class if meant for fun-it lasts an hour and they have various packages. Ours included all kinds of freebies and discounts plus tickets to a strip show. It's great for a group of gals and the souvenir pictures are classic.

If you do go, let me know what kind of people are in your class. You will be shocked at the people who attend these things! I asked the instructor if this was normal, and she said yes.