Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Hindsight is 20/20

Ahhh the one who got away. He has such power; able to bring both nostalgia, bitterness and regret when he enters the mind. Some people have more than one that got away and let’s face it any guy you come across with a ring on his finger is one who got away. But THE ONE who got away has the power to bring you right back to the time you could have been something more than what you were no matter where you are in life. Or who you are with.

My one that got away is a high school crush. I say crush because we have never been able to get our shit together enough to actually date. Scott, or CHOPS as my step father affectionately calls him, was in my junior year math class. He was a senior (I’m just that smart…well, I was in high school). We sat next to each other. You could often find us talking between classes. When second semester rolled around and we no longer had class together, I’d slip silly notes into his math class before it started. I had the BIGGEST crush on him.

Come to find out, it was mutual. Though we had so many miscalculations I would never have thought he was interested. And apparently he somehow had no clue I was interested in him. A quick run down of our near misses:

  • He asked me to go see a movie with him in typical, vague high school fashion. The only thing he said was “Want to go see a movie Friday”. Which would lead one to believe he would confirm at another point in time the time and movie you’d be seeing. Or that he was just saying it to say it. Either way, by 6:15 pm on said Friday I hadn’t heard a word from him and feeling depressed called my friend Cortney. She suggested shopping and in less than five minutes was at my house picking me up. At 6:30 pm, my newly acquired cell phone was ringing. My mom wanted to notify me that a very attractive boy was at the house looking for me. Well, what the hell did he expect? He never specified a time! And after sitting around all afternoon waiting for him, I assumed something better came along so I went on a pity party to the mall!
  • Another time, he mentioned a band was playing and said I should go. Not I should go with him. I thought it was just a general friend to friend suggestion. So I skipped out. Which I heard through the grapevine Monday, he was rather upset about. Whoops.
  • He did manage to ask me to prom one afternoon in the hallway between classes (this was before MTV had everyone thinking you had to ask your date in elaborate, 80s movie style). I said yes and got so excited. I immediately went dress shopping. At prom, we barely danced. We got back to the house for the after party. He wrestled a friend, broke his finger, and another girl in our group proceeded to hop in his lap and coddle his finger. Well, what was I supposed to do then? Kick her ass? Fuck that, I played pool with a trio of guys who came over even though they didn’t go to Prom. If he wanted me to take care of he should have unceremoniously dumped her on her skinny ass and told me so.

Since then, we went off to college at UGA, graduated and moved on. We randomly bumped into each other making empty promises to hang out (and invariably making whoever was with us uncomfortable with our affection for each other). Now, he lives in Jacksonville and I live in Atlanta. I’m lucky if I see him more than once or twice a year. Though we’ve made efforts to make it more, one of us always ends up blowing the other off when we make plans that involve just the two of us grabbing dinner. We flirt, facebook, text and always grab a picture together for our parents (who not so secretly want us to get it together). We’ve shared couches and cuddled in hotel rooms but never got past that. I’ve never even kissed him! His sister pulled me aside at the last wedding we were all at to tell me that we had to get together because she had a dream that we were married and how perfect would that be? Which now has him on my mind…ALL THE TIME.

Who is your one who got away? Is there someone who you dated and wished you had stuck it out with? Has anybody looked their one who got away up and tried a second time around?

2 comments:

AshleyRae said...

(sorry had to delete my previous comment b/c my lack of spell check pissed me off) Anyways! My guy: His name was Tommy. My high school crush, we lost touch around Senior year. He went to Norcross, played football and I was completely smitten. Like yourself, timing was never there with us. After he found out I didn't go to our prom, he was like "why didn't you tell me, I would have taken you!" Broke my heart. And then I went to college and never saw him again. I randomly have searched for him on facebook, to no avail. But I always think "what if things would have gone in another direction?" Ohhh sigh...the one who got away.

Hot Mess said...

there's only one i can think of that honestly got away and i don't think i'll ever get him back...he was a bar tender in athens - and before you say anything to knock bartenders from athens, i'll just say he was not your average "sleep with every sorostitute you can" bartender. He was quite the opposite of that in fact. We sort of went out on a couple dates but nothing even happened on the dates. Then I showed up in his bar shnockered and made out w/ someone else right in front of him a couple months later. THen was mortified, refused to go back to his bar for 3 months. saw him about 2 weeks before he moved home (he had already graduated college) for GOOD and i still had another year at school left. He came up to visit athens at the end of the summer and we finally semi-hooked up (if you can call it that) but he didn't think it was right trying to start something when he was planning to move across the country in the next month. Then I moved home the next year and he was home for a couple months then moved again to NYC. Now has a gf, so FML. And she sucks. And i still have a crush on him. however, he DOES still make a point to call me EVERY time he comes to athens or atlanta so maybe all's not well in NYC (cross ur fingers!)

i'm pretty sure that ship has sailed but one can dream...