Thirsty Thursday

So, I'm a little behind on my ESPN the Magazine reading since moving. The whole I couldn't find several issues and then the whole the fucking USPS is taking TEN fucking years to give me a key to my mailbox thing is really a hinderance to the whole thing. But just in time for football season to start up, I read the August 9th issue (only to realize I hadn't read the issue immediately preceding it. Whoops). And thank god I did because living in the South and being the fan of an SEC I'm always at a loss of what to wear to football games. Never fear, dear ones, I bring to you...

Tailgate Couture.

You know the SEC gals like to look sharp at footballs games (guys too though no one gives a shit if they were the same damn outfit for 11 games in a row....or for that matter as many games as it fits and doesn't look like someone shit on the ensemble). Right now, I'm struggling with what to wear because I'm not in college anymore. Is the adorable red and black sundress with UGA flipflops still appropriate attire? Should I be more dressed up? Less dressed up? Personally, I'd be down with a jean skirt and jersey but my friends just haven't hit that point yet. Some of them even wear heels to the game which kills me.

Sometimes, I worry I won't look classy enough at these events. Because God knows, sippin on bourbon and throwin bean bags into a hole is the epitome of class. And you must look your best when participating in activities like chugging beer, scarfing down burgers, flipping cups, filling flasks, falling down drunk in a trash can, making out with randos, screaming at satellite tv when it goes on the fritz during an important rivalry game, dominating beer pong or whatever the fuck it is you people do at a tailgate. You never know, you might meet your future husband at one of these classy events (though its lost some of its lustre now that they banned fun from North Campus).

With dresses from Tailgate Couture, I can go from daytime tailgate drinking to nighttime shots at AllGood Lounge with ease. I'll look as though I went home to change between events (albeit with vomit stains down the front but it adds character, bitches). You have five dresses to choose from and can customize the colors any way you'd like.

For the classy, I-have-a-wedding-to-attend-post-noon-game kickoff, we have the Ashley Mini ($84). This dress can totally be worn again. In fact, why not make it your next bridesmaids dress?

For the I'm-still-totally-getting-where-Avril-is-coming-from seven pm game, we have the Jessica Ruffle dress (Also $84). Looks great with unkempt, I-didn't-have-time-to-shower-before stumbling-to-this-east-bumble-tailgate location hair.

For the I-drank-too-fucking-much-last-night-and-may-or-may-not-be-pregnant 3 pm game, we have the Cammy Tee dress (an affordable $76 bucks). Bitch for $10 bucks at Walmart you could buy a black tshirt and some ribbon and make a much cuter dress. If you were feeling broke and crafty. I'm just saying.

And why the fuck do these girls look miserable?