From the Mailbag

I know this may come as a surprise to all 5 of my public readers but the fact is I do have people who email me with questions in regards to various posts. So, I have decided I will address them periodically. If you have questions or comments, you are always welcome to leave them in the comments section or if your prudish nature would prefer the world not know you are asking me sexual questions, you can email me at mylittleblackbook11@gmail.com.


dude...hahahaha, first off...were you really asleep & he took it upon himself to put his penis inside you? cause if so....thats creepy as fuck & sexual assault...how long b4 u woke up u think & decided to go with it? why did you stop if he was already in? was it bad, or just morals? basically i need more deets!!!

Okay, I suppose I didn't really quench a thirst with my story of the first time I've done the deed in 6 months. The fact of the matter is alcohol was involved and I was asleep to begin with. But I will try my best to explain the thoughts and reasoning behind putting a halt to sexual conquest #12.

1. Yes, I did wake up to find tab B had been inserted into tab A. At first, I thought I was having a lovely dream so in between dreamland and reality I suppose I felt some foreplay going on...the lips at my neck, hands stroking over me. But since, I thought it was a dream I just continued to enjoy it. For all I know, I encouraged it through movement.
2. I don't know that I would go so far as to call this sexual assault. I didn't object to anything and we had been flirting through the night. Booze had been drank in mass quantities and I don't know if I egged him on while half asleep. So, I wouldn't go so far as to report him to the authorities since the memory of how it all began is muddled. Had he not stopped when I put a halt to it, then I would call it sexual assault.
3. I don't know how long this was going on because I was asleep when it started. I do know in the lovely dream I was having I was definitely having really good sex as a result of spooning. So it wasn't like the guy mounted me and began spasmodically thrusting into me. Of course, it all started in a dream like state so it seems rather nice when I recall the whole thing.
4. I never made a decision to go with it. When I realized I was in fact having sex and not dreaming as I usually am at night, I put a stop to it.
5. Why? Well, for one, I wanted to be fully conscious for my first time having sex in 6 months. For another, until the next day when I went on a stalking mission via facebook I did not even know this guy's last name. And thirdly, we were in a child's bedroom (not that I haven't done that before) at a house party. There were people all over the damn house, including in the room we were in. I'm slightly slutty but not an exhibitionist!
6. Finally, the sex was not bad. It was actually really good but that just could be because it was a real live penis attached to a real live boy. Morally, I have no objection to one night stands. I just wasn't in the moment as I felt I should be and I was not comfortable with the locale or the person. There was a time I might have ignored all of this but not anymore. At 26, I feel you've got to start having a little respect for yourself. But not so much respect to keep me from sneaking out and sleeping on a couch in the basement upon his falling asleep.