Internet Stalking Has Hit A New Low...

When you aren’t getting laid, there is nothing better than having a crush. Okay, sure sex in cop cars or hooking up on boats are pretty damn cool for one night stands but for the long haul crushes are what get you through the night. Stalking your crushes via the interwebs is even better.

As previously stated, I officially know my Gym Crush’s first and last name. On that level, I can no longer be considered a slut if I hook up with him. Armed with that information, I was able to use my handy dandy journalism skills to dig up some more deets on the muscled man who stars in so many of my fantasies. Since I know you loyal readers are wondering what is going on and like to be kept up to date, I thought I would share them with you all:

1. Homeboy has a brother. A what? A brother. You’re telling me there are TWO of my gym crush? Shit boi, tell me more. Well, Gym Crush just casually mentioned the brother so there was no way for me to casually dig up any more info on him. I wonder if he is as hot and dedicated to his body being a temple as Gym Crush is? Is he younger or older? Married or single?
2. He’s a family man and that was instilled in him by his Pops. His mom and dad own a trucking company here in Georgia and he’ll eventually inherit it (with my deductive reasoning skills, I think his brother must be younger). They’ve had the company for 25 years and with some sleuthing I was able to determine that they bring in between 3-5 million per year. The company employs 25 people according to their D&B. And I now have contact information through his work. And he’s listed as Sales Executive. Funny when you think he is covered in tattoos and piercings and getting business for the company (which his father cannot stand).
3. He’s heading to Panama City Beach next week. Yes, the Redneck Riviera. Boys Trip. Hmmm, might be time to rethink my vacation… What happens in Panama stays in Panama...
4. His wife’s name is Sandy.
5. He believes in honesty. As in, if his wife gets fat, he’ll leave her. So he told her so.
6. He attended the 14th Annual Tattoo Arts Convention in Atlanta in June. Where he got a tattoo on his torso. I’m going to spend my down time locating him through the 40+ vendors on the website. If I find a photo and post it here, someone ought to send me a prize.
   

Also, I’m pretty close to figuring out where he lives. For the sake of the blog. Just to see if I can do it. I’m not going to show up there and steal him out from under his wife. Like I could do that. But I would like to prove how fucking easy it is the learn EVERYTHING about someone just by searching the internet. And trust me, Gym Crush has an EXTREMELY common name so if I figure this out….well, private detecting might need to be my new calling.