Twitter Tuesday.

I am bringing back an oldie that the real owner of this blog has not done recently {in her defense I don't think she has done much of anything unrelated to work lately}. I found this individual as I was laying in bed last night and I am a HUGE fan.  Allow me to introduce you to @cubicletweets and here are a few of my favorites....

• I would transfer you to her voicemail but then I have to press like two buttons and then talk to someone and I just don't want to do that.
• Since the water cooler is broken, I just might die of dehydration and lack of office gossip.
• I am only 2 hours into the 46 hour work week and I already want to shoot myself
• i think i just had a cubicle induced panic attack. that's grounds for going home right?
• my phone is about to die. they're are annoying people in costumes everywhere. i need a cigarette. i'm sick. i can't drink. i hate my life
• I'm using @foursquare for the first time and it says my office isn't showing up as a location. My search term is Hell. Can anyone help me?
• You know that urban legend about the dog in the microwave? Yeah that's what the microwave in our fucking office looks like.
•    My fucking desk is fucking stressing me out.
•    This office is a cesspool of disease and bad fashion.
• You have been talking about apple pie for 34 minutes. I've been timing you. Its been 34 fucking minutes. Now 35. 35 minutes
•    i don't want to hear about your vacation. actually, i don't even want to hear you talk.
• a bird just landed on a tree outside my window, looked at me and then took off and i thought to myself, "you lucky son of a bitch."
•    i really didn't think it was possible for me to hate something more than Monday, but Tuesday, you're really making progress
• The last 5 minutes of the work week has got to be similar to water boarding at Guantanamo Bay.

I really could go on for awhile, but I will stop.  And no, this in no way reflects how I feel about my job... I just found him/her to be entertaining