Monday Musings

• It's been a while. For that I apologize.
• Larry Munson, voice of the DAWGS, passed away from complications with Pneumonia. It's a sad day in the bulldog nation. I'm going to spend the day listening to his playcalling. You can read his favorite calls here.
• Software testing is the PITS. Nothing works and it is a lot of fucking work that takes away from doing your actual job. I can't recruit if I'm over here trying to figure out what the fuck is going on with our applicant tracking system in time for the rollout.
• The other day in the middle of the day a guy showed up and knocked on my door. I answered it. He said he had the wrong address and walked away. I just got an email from my landlord that the guy was there to move my shit out because he had been given the wrong address and thought the condo was under foreclosure. She had to assure me that her payments on the condo are up to date and I am not going anywhere. Imagine if I hadn't been home. I'd have come home to nothing in my condo and thought I'd been robbed. That is a scary thought.
• I have so much to do before the holiday. Like unpacking from the weekend and repacking for 5 days. And cleaning my apartment in case someone comes to move me out so they think I am not a slob.
• What the fuck is with people updating their fb statuses to tell me what they are thankful for? Look I don't give a shit. 90% of it is stupid shit. 5% doesn't make sense to anyone but you and your besties. 5% of it is valid. Therefore, I now think you are a vain and shallow person with no clue about the world around you. If that is what you are going for then CONGRATS! GREAT SUCCESS!
• This weekend I took my mom to the UGA football game. We played Kentucky and clinched the SEC East. Awesome right?  Except in the span of 5 minutes, I broke my new iPhone and she lost her new iPhone. Like mother, like daughter, eh? No one should be surprised by me but everyone will be shocked by my mom. That is the last time I take her to a college football game.
• I really wonder what some people do all damn day that they can send me 800+ emails when I have already said I will get the information to them when I get a chance. CHILL THE FUCK OUT MY DAMN OUT OF OFFICE IS ON.
• The only way for me to lose weight is to constantly eat the same damn thing. Every day. I am so bored. Then I flip out from boredom, go to Arbys and order the entire menu and weigh 10 lbs more than I did when I started. WTF IS WRONG WITH ME?!?!
• Apparently the entire damn company is on vacation this week. Makes my job a little more difficult.
• Dear everyone, I think I am done with weddings after next year. DONE.
• Why the fuck am I watching Knight and Day? I cannot stand Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz is alternately the most annoying fucking actress ever and a slightly tolerable one.
• Why do people try to schedule conference calls for the very next day? I don't know about them but I have a damn job and I'm doing it. Why are people so surprised when I'm unable to speak due to my schedule?

How a Life in Shambles Moves part three

Clearly my new place needs to be condemned. In other news, I built a desk and a tv cart (sans wheels because a guy in Target said if someone came in and saw my tube on a cart with wheels I'd never get laid again. I happen to agree). One of these days, everything will be put together.

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

How a Life in Shambles Moves part dos

Well, the dining room table has been put back together by yours truly. Unfortunately in doing so, I've essentially locked myself in my apartment.

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Did You Know? Cause I Sure as Shit DID NOT.

Just read on to see what is really grinding my gears presently.

Email from me to my apt on Friday at around 2:30 pm:

Last question I swear! Mailbox and key? I have two apt keys... Thanks- I love the place and you were a great help in finding it!

Reponse from apt Monday at 9:50 am:

The Post Office is down Roswell Rd. on the left beside the Dunkin Donughts and Outback Steakhouse. Go to usps.com to get an actual street address. You have to schedule an appointment to have your lock's re-keyed. Glad you like the place, let me know if you have any more questions.

Response to their response at 3:34 pm today:

I've never had to do this with another apartment complex so I wouldn't have thought to ask. I suppose that is a mistake on my part and a lesson learned. However, I'm a little disappointed I wasn't told about this to begin with, especially after calling USPS and finding out it is going to cost me $28 to have this service performed. Might want to keep that in mind for people you show these apartments to in the future. Knowing this up front would have made a difference to me as now I cannot have access to my mail until I have the money to pay for this service.

And their response to that at 4:05 pm today:

I'm not sure how many different apartments you have lived in, but this is a fairly common thing. We have no authority over the stand-alone mail box's. The Post Office has installed these stand-alone box's at 95% of our properties and all over Atlanta. The $28 is essentially the same thing as a set up fee for your power, cable, etc. If the $28 is too much for you to float at this point you can simply get a P.O. box. You are not required to set up your mailbox, it is simply for your convenience.

WHAT.THE.FUCK? And this completely relates to my planned WIG OUT WEDNESDAY about the post office and governments attempts to keep America working. Suffice to say, if you watch the news, USPS is reporting a decline in revenue. I'm not sure how since you are charging me fucking 28 to use my own mailbox.

Also, just in case anyone was wondering, I switched power companies and didn't have to pay any connection fees so my apt complex can kiss it.

And, I've lived in 4 apartments jackass and never had this happen before. And my parents, between the two of them, have lived in about 15 and never had this issue. So clearly, it has nothing to do with the number of apartments I've lived in and everything to do with you failing to mention pertinent details (other pertinent details I know nothing about: how to access the free wi-fi they offered me and whether I can use the closet with the number 14 on it below my apt).

Clearly, my decision making skills should be called into question at this point.

How a Life In Shambles Moves

Clearly there is no fucking rhyme or reason to this process despite my best efforts.
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

Monday Musings

• Moving is a bitch. No really, a bitch. Unpacking is the worst.
• My alma mater is the number one party school. Clearly the voters missed the Miley Cyrus ripoff orientation video in the previous post. WTF is that?
• Why is furniture so fucking expensive? How do poor people furnish their apartments?
• Apparently, if you hit enter in the wrong spot, this will post without being completed. So if you follow in google reader or something, check back for updates. Whoops.
• I can't get internet until fucking Friday. So this will be a boring week. Guess I could unpack all my shit.
• A company I sent my resume to a while back just sent me a job posting for a part time Account Coordinator. Which sounds like a cool gig except for that whole part time thing. Because the job posting says 75% travel. I can't live off a part time gig so I'd need a second job which would be IMPOSSIBLE if I was traveling. How the hell can anyone take a part time gig that involves 75% travel? It doesn't even make sense.
• I feel like I need to hit enter after each bullet so it updates in your reader. Thus elongating the process of posting. Which is already long since I have to wait for shit to come to me. The brain is not functioning today.
• Homeslice and Clearly. Two words I have been using entirely too much. Can't stop. Won't stop.
• I wish I had honed in on a marketable talent back in high school. So I could have put the hard work in on Mommy's tab as opposed to my own. Also, I wish life was like the movies and I could be Jenna Dewan in Step Up- girl has skillz and ends up with Channing Tatum. Wait, was this real life or a movie?
• I just thought of a funny story. But it seems like it should be put in its own blog post. So hopefully I remember that later otherwise, you'll never see it.
• Eric Church just emailed me. Okay, not him actually, but his people. He has a new video coming out. SAY WHAT!?!?!?! I will be tuning in Friday, homeslice. Don't you worry. If you don't know who Eric Church is...we're gonna have a problem being friends. Just so you know.
• I got accused of being on a Roid Rage Saturday night. Made more ironic by the fact that the person who made the accusation, is the one who started the events that unfolded. Also, funny is the fact that he absolutely refuses to acknowledge that the other person was in the wrong. Also, since when is ignoring someone who is blatantly talkin shit about you while you are standing right there a Roid Rage? And, while we're on the topic, stop trying to deflect everyone's interest onto me from the fact that you were holding hands with said person WHILE IN THE SAME ROOM AS YOUR GIRLFRIEND. Who was 10x more pissed off than I was. Roid Rant over.
• Why do I think it is more acceptable to blog at work than look for a new job at work?
• The bad thing about blogging at work is that work gets in the way plus I cannot link to anything since it's all blocked. So blogging this week will BLOW. Just skip on over to next week folks.

Erin is moving to DC.

Ok not really. But I think she should. Oh wait, this is Barbie not Erin. Just saying hello again. ...ok back on track. Erin is not actually moving to DC but I think she should. For a few months now I have heard how she wants to "change it up" and how is is "over Georgia". She talks about Raleigh, but really Erin other than your Uncle, who do you know in Raleigh? Would your life really be that exciting? ...So on my way to work this morning I decided to take Erin's "Monday Musing" format but turn it into - Erin is relocating to DC and this is why.

• Because I am. That should be enough right there but I will continue on.
• There are Mexican restaurants and Mexican Cantinas all over DC and Northern VA. And there are plenty of patios to sit on and drink margaritas and eat cheese dip. Mexican adventures are not limited to the state of Georgia, my friend.
• Running. There are so many beautiful places in DC to run. We can run through all the monuments and along the water and with the cherry blossoms. There are PLENTY of 5ks and 10ks up there too. They even have half marathons and full marathons. Plus the summers do not get as hot and humid as they do here in ATL and training in the summer for races in miserable. We could run through the Zoo. How cool would that be ... run run run wave at the panda run run run
• You converse a lot with my high school buddy Blake (@udothedishes) on twitter. You can formally meet him and talk face to face rather than on the Internet. See you already have 2 friends in the DC area.
• FREE. There are so many FREE things to do on the weekends. Free is nice. We like free.
• Okay, sure it is expensive to live up there but who cares ... there are so many FREE things to do on the weekends.
• ....Don't know know someone who recently moved up there? So you'll have 3 friends automatically. You're becoming quite popular.
• Driving. Lets get real for one second. No one in Atlanta knows how to drive. NO ONE. Erin has spoken of this many many times before. Sure in DC, you have to fight the Diplomats who think they can do whatever they want - but 97% of people in the DC Metro area get in their car and just fucking DRIVE. They put their foot on the pedal and move. None of this getting in the left hand lane shit and puttering down the road 30 mph under the speed limit. Sure, you may get run over but at least the car that ran you over was/is going forward. Oh and when there is rain, wind, anything other than sunny days people in DC drive like there is nothing going on.
• The weather. All is does in Georgia is rain. Sure it rains in DC too, but I do not remember this much rain. Yes, it snows in DC and it gets insanely cold ... but hey, you're from Jersey you can handle it. And winter coats are super cute... who doesn't love a coat, scarf, gloves combo.
• It is GREAT to have new scenery. It would be lame to live in one place practically your whole entire life.
• The Gannett Company is like housed in the Nation's Capital's backyard of McLean, VA. You could go work for them and be a great journalist for like USA Today. I could even drive you to your interview - I know where they're located.
• There is so much to do. You have Georgetown and Olde Town Alexandria and the Tyson's area, and Annapolis. You would love Adam's Morgan - a big long road of watering holes.

And that is my argument. Think on it. Let it marinate. Get back to me at dinner tomorrow night. All the cool kids are moving to DC! ;o)