R's response to my Plastered Pick
First of all before I respond, Eric Church just came on. Right when I hit the reply button. "How bout you". I think that is a sign. A sign for what, I have no idea. I'm going to assume it means you're email is spot on, 100% correct.
Second of all, I have a question. I know when it came down to it, you would not do this, but you've got to admit that it might just cross your mind if the Dawgs made the National Championship. It would cross my mind for sure:
http://www.ajc.com/news/woman-charged-with-offering-175986.html?cxntlid=thbz_hm
By the way, the last sentence in that story is f'ing hilarious to me.
Thirdly, i was kind of dragging this morning. Now, due to this email, I am alive. I am ready. Ready for what, I don't know. Probably booze if I had to guess. And now that I think about it, if Ernest came over right now and offered me a beer, i would freakin pound it.
Fourth, your email should be posted somewhere. It pretty much covers it all. From God to Soulja Boy. Finally, I my prediction is very simple. Dawgs 31, Gators 26. That's what popped in my brain while I was typing. So, boom. Geno Atkins breaks Tebow's leg in the 4th quarter. Geno then takes off Timmy's helmet and cleet's him in the face while he lays helpless on the ground. After the game concludes, Richt pretends to go in for the handshake, and then, boom, psyche, b*&ch slaps Meyer in the face followed by a swift kick to his non-professional region. Meyer cries like a baby, and is fired due to his gayness. Tebow never plays again, gets married to an underage Argentinian woman, and lives happily ever after performing circumcisions and being a complete homo.
Showing posts with label DAWGS. Show all posts
Showing posts with label DAWGS. Show all posts
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Hate Week
Okay, so I'm a UGA fan and this week is hate week. Below is an email I sent to my friend R about my thoughts on this weekend's game. Bear in mind I am currently hammered. Like at this moment. And I just hit send so at that moment too. You'd be hammered too if you got in a wreck with a Florida fan!
Okay, so by close of business I meant MY close of business which is...well, damn, I was going to say when I go to bed but that made me think I sounded like something you don't talk about on someone's professional email. Anyway, you catch my drift. After stopping at panda express I went into the kitchen to discover I have about 10 bottles of wine (and one bottle of champagne me thinks will be making a trip to Jacksonville). After a millisecond of contemplation, I thought to myself, why not indulge. It isn't every day you get hit by a car. Okay, in my case that is a lie, but whatever. I can't let 10 bottles of wine just SIT on the counter. That would be sacrilegious. Or something. Also, I have discovered I have a lot of songs on my computer I hate. But that is beside the point. The point is, two bottles down and I'm ready to write you a paragraph (or two apparently). So without further ado (but with some sort of grapefruit-pineapple-rum concoction that I just...concocted) I give you: Erin's Plastered Pick.
Dawgs win by eleventy billion. Okay, that's a lie. They don't but wouldn't it be great to just stomp it down their throats so hard and so many times that they...nevermind, work email. Anyway, I would love a reversal of our 47-7 loss a few years back as payback but what I am thinking will be far sweeter (if more likely to induce a heart attack or coma). I have concluded that the Dawgs will win... 21-17. I know, completely random. My thought here is that our defense will be sufficient but our offense is going to take it to the house. Because, obviously, Bobo has been practicing some screen shit the likes of we haven't seen all season (in the fourth quarter- I figure it will take three quarters to war, up. Okay one touchdown in the first quarter, two in the fourth). Christ I wish Joe Cox and his receivers could have stars align so they had fanfreakingtastic games on the same damn day. Also, I imagine we will for once master the two minute drill in a way that will leave Tim Tebow wishing he could go full time into mission trips or whatever the hell his daddy does. WTF is this home schooling crap? I am so confused by that- it truly boggles the mind that such a tool could be given athletic talent too. He's supposed to be an antisocial geek. And I firmly believe GOD is a UGA fan, not a Tim "the next toolbag prophet" fan. Anyway,I fully support letting them lead the entire f'ing game and then BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM. I know I would probably denounce them half a dozen times during the game (when will we get this penalty stuff under control?) but I would love to hand the Gators a heart breaking defeat in the last seconds when they have already begun trash talking all over facebook, twitter and whatever social networking sites they frequent (match.com probably). I can just see them now, down for the first time the whole game, they push it down the field but cannot push Tebow over the goal line to break Herschel Walker's record (which is not broken for a variety of reasons- the most important being that they don't even belong in the same sentence let alone stratosphere) so they settle for a field goal figuring a thus far lackluster (with spurts of brilliance) performance by the UGA Offense (can the OLine please get their shit together?). Suddenly, Soulja Boy can be heard (and seen) coming from all areas inside and outside the stadium and 2:00 are on the clock. And FIRE. I predict last second touchdown by either AJ Green or Washaun Ealey (because I have the 24 jersey and that would be pimptastic). The end. Okay, not the end, the end will occur after I imbibe copious amounts of booze and discuss what is lacking in Florida fans anatomy. Ohhh the end is a horrendous hangover and a long drive home to GODS COUNTRY.
How's that for compliant?
Now, you're turn. But sober.
PS. I read and reread this a dozen times and spell checked. If it is f'ed up, don't tell me. I like to pretend I make sense when sober. May the slop be with you.
Okay, so by close of business I meant MY close of business which is...well, damn, I was going to say when I go to bed but that made me think I sounded like something you don't talk about on someone's professional email. Anyway, you catch my drift. After stopping at panda express I went into the kitchen to discover I have about 10 bottles of wine (and one bottle of champagne me thinks will be making a trip to Jacksonville). After a millisecond of contemplation, I thought to myself, why not indulge. It isn't every day you get hit by a car. Okay, in my case that is a lie, but whatever. I can't let 10 bottles of wine just SIT on the counter. That would be sacrilegious. Or something. Also, I have discovered I have a lot of songs on my computer I hate. But that is beside the point. The point is, two bottles down and I'm ready to write you a paragraph (or two apparently). So without further ado (but with some sort of grapefruit-pineapple-rum concoction that I just...concocted) I give you: Erin's Plastered Pick.
Dawgs win by eleventy billion. Okay, that's a lie. They don't but wouldn't it be great to just stomp it down their throats so hard and so many times that they...nevermind, work email. Anyway, I would love a reversal of our 47-7 loss a few years back as payback but what I am thinking will be far sweeter (if more likely to induce a heart attack or coma). I have concluded that the Dawgs will win... 21-17. I know, completely random. My thought here is that our defense will be sufficient but our offense is going to take it to the house. Because, obviously, Bobo has been practicing some screen shit the likes of we haven't seen all season (in the fourth quarter- I figure it will take three quarters to war, up. Okay one touchdown in the first quarter, two in the fourth). Christ I wish Joe Cox and his receivers could have stars align so they had fanfreakingtastic games on the same damn day. Also, I imagine we will for once master the two minute drill in a way that will leave Tim Tebow wishing he could go full time into mission trips or whatever the hell his daddy does. WTF is this home schooling crap? I am so confused by that- it truly boggles the mind that such a tool could be given athletic talent too. He's supposed to be an antisocial geek. And I firmly believe GOD is a UGA fan, not a Tim "the next toolbag prophet" fan. Anyway,I fully support letting them lead the entire f'ing game and then BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM. I know I would probably denounce them half a dozen times during the game (when will we get this penalty stuff under control?) but I would love to hand the Gators a heart breaking defeat in the last seconds when they have already begun trash talking all over facebook, twitter and whatever social networking sites they frequent (match.com probably). I can just see them now, down for the first time the whole game, they push it down the field but cannot push Tebow over the goal line to break Herschel Walker's record (which is not broken for a variety of reasons- the most important being that they don't even belong in the same sentence let alone stratosphere) so they settle for a field goal figuring a thus far lackluster (with spurts of brilliance) performance by the UGA Offense (can the OLine please get their shit together?). Suddenly, Soulja Boy can be heard (and seen) coming from all areas inside and outside the stadium and 2:00 are on the clock. And FIRE. I predict last second touchdown by either AJ Green or Washaun Ealey (because I have the 24 jersey and that would be pimptastic). The end. Okay, not the end, the end will occur after I imbibe copious amounts of booze and discuss what is lacking in Florida fans anatomy. Ohhh the end is a horrendous hangover and a long drive home to GODS COUNTRY.
How's that for compliant?
Now, you're turn. But sober.
PS. I read and reread this a dozen times and spell checked. If it is f'ed up, don't tell me. I like to pretend I make sense when sober. May the slop be with you.
Monday, September 7, 2009
Emotional Eating...and sickness
Weight: 165.6
Workout: hour walk
Food Journal:
breakfast- banana pancakes and grapefruit juice
snack- skinny cow dipper
I haven't had lunch yet but I will say I'm felling terrible- possibly from the loss of UGAs football game and my ensuing drunkfest to forget it (and of course commemorate the wedding of Claire and Colin). But my throat is now killing me and my ear feels a little funny so I think I am getting sick now. But I will try to remember what I have eaten the past three days....
Friday- a day of snacking
Breakfast was eggs with pico de gallo and hot sauce as well as a glass of grapefruit juice. I was pretty fulfilled but I think 1/2 an english muffin might be a good addition.
Snack was a snack pack which i found in the Not that section of Eat This Not That so I guess as soon as I finish these off, I will ditch them.
Second snack was a Fiber One bar.
Third snack was cream cheese and jalapeno appetizers from pillsbury (only 200 calories)
Fourth snack was skinny dippers
Finally, dinner came around and I was hungry enough to REALLY eat. My sister and I made grilled chicken in sun dried tomato marinade and made them into sandwiches with lettuce and tomato. And cajun seasoned french fries.
After wandering Wal Mart my sister and I picked up some ice cream (after comparing brands and finding one with only 200 calories).
I also worked out for 2 hours so that was good!
Saturday:
For breakfast I had a banana and organic chocolate milk from Horizons. After going for a mile run, biking for 45 minutes and using the elliptical for 30 minutes. Then I cut myself off because I was heading to a wedding and would be snacking and drinking. So, bad decision, but I actually wasn't hungry most of the day. For dinner, I had steak and some salad. And about 2 bottles of wine. Then the dawgs lost and all hell broke loose. Beer, shots, wine and popcorn. Blackout.
Sunday:
Doritos for breakfast. I was lucky to be moving. Lunch was pepperoni pizza. Chips and Dip. Some Corona Light. And some fabulous grilled pork. Pass out.
Update:
Dinner was Potato soup with grilled cheese. A few quakes to round it out. Massive quantities of Diet Ginger Ale. Tylenol night medication rounded it out and led to 10 straight hours of sleep after a 4 hour nap during the day.
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