As you loyal readers know, The Commercial Banker and I made a bet after a week of shit talking and I lost. So Monday arrived and we decided on some take out and Monday night football. Unfortunately, after an epic Saturday both of us were exhausted and the idea of beer to go with our football was not one we considered.
I think we should have.
It was AWKWARD.
How on earth could we have had so much fun years ago and via text and then have absolutely ZERO chemistry on the date? Everything about it felt forced which bummed me out because considering it was my first date since I was in high school and a virgin, I was pretty excited about it. And I thought a low-key night in would be a good option because it wouldn't feel so pressured.
Boy, was I wrong.
He was friendly and cute enough. But I can't figure if some of his expectations of how I was looking these days were not met or if we were both just exhausted. Sitting on a comfy couch did nothing but make me want to sleep (when normally I'd be contemplating having sex on said couch).
First, can I just say, he has a very cute little house and a dog. The dog actually climbed up on the couch at one point and was sniffing my hair and cuddling with me (which is more than I can say for The Commercial Banker). He did walk out to the car when I pulled up so clearly he'd been watching for me. He looked cute- glasses, plaid button down with the sleeves rolled up, khaki shorts and sneakers (not running or workout shoes, sneakers that he clearly wore a good bit and were like adidas old school shoes or something). Clearly my choice of khaki colored tank top and jeans with platforms was a good one (Judging by his "Hey, look at you. you look great" when I got out of the car). He was super excited about my choice in Meat Lovers pizza and salad (and offered to let me take the leftovers home). So that's the start....
So we sat down and watched True Blood first during which we ended up talking about everything under the sun. We ate our pizza and salad (he had never had a salad from there and approved of my choice) and drank waters. Then we started watching football during which he joked we should make another bet which of course led to sex talk. There was a lot of silence during the tv watching but it wasn't uncomfortable at all. We were both really, ridiculously tired and acknowledged it. We tried to look up Youtube videos from Jon Lajoie but his internet was acting up so I emailed him two of them this morning that I thought he would like.
Umm, homeboy owns Twilight, New Moon and 500 days of summer. So cute. And watches Vampire Diaries. He seemed really impressed with all the things I am interested in which was good but I think it being Monday night (he says he's normally in bed by like 9 on Mondays) and us both being tired kind of sucked. At the end of the football game (a bet I would have lost ps) he walked me out to my car and gave me a hug (but not before he showed me his bedroom? to which I said so this is where the magic happens and he kind of laughed and was like not really). He told me to drive safe and mentioned more than once the next time we hang out so I don't know what that means. He did ask me if I had big plans for the weekend and I said not yet but then he didn't ask if I wanted to hang out so...
Showing posts with label Dating. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dating. Show all posts
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Monday, September 20, 2010
Dating Dilemma Part One
I thought since I'm hopping back into the dating saddle (okay not hopping...ummm dipping my pinkie toe into the shallow end of the pool I guess would be a more appropriate analogy) that I would reflect on past dating dilemmas. Maybe mull them over, ask your opinions, etc. Today, what's on my mind? Why, sex of course.
As we all know, I've been a big proponent of dating backwards simply because I've always been drunk/stupid/needy or whatever the case may be. So, clearly, I've had no issue sleeping with someone on or even before the first date. BUT...let's say I was a more traditional sort.
How soon is too soon to start the discussion on your sexual proclivities? For instance, I once went on a date with a guy who asked me if I like anal. On the first date. I was kind of unsure how to answer that one as I've never had someone ask me outright like that. Needless to say, we did not have a second date and I've always wondered if it was because I was unwilling to address my willingness (or unwillingness) to be sexually adventuresome.
In my opinion, if you're doing the traditional dating thing, discussing ones likes or dislikes between the sheets is a little premature on the first date. If you're lips haven't locked with mine I would rather not tell you what goes on when I spread my legs. Hell, you may never have the chance to find out so probably you should work on the whole build up (foreplay if you will) before you decide to get straight to business. Let me tell you, you asking me if I like anal, if I'll give you a blow job or telling me you want to cum in my face is not endearing you to me. And it is definitely not upping your chances of ever finding out first hand what I like. Whether I want those things or not, it shows to me you're not looking for a relationship, you're looking for a sex toy.
On the other hand, maybe you're asking because you're very sexual and you need to know if I am, too. I can see you not wanting to waste your time on someone who would turn their nose up on what brings you pleasure. But again, I just am not sure asking someone that on the first date is really the way to go. And what if I say no to anal because I've never had anyone ask me to do that with them? Then you could be missing out on something because you're thinking if I haven't done it I wouldn't be interested.
What are your thoughts? Have you been asked what your sexual preferences are on the first date? When is the appropriate time to start asking those questions?
As we all know, I've been a big proponent of dating backwards simply because I've always been drunk/stupid/needy or whatever the case may be. So, clearly, I've had no issue sleeping with someone on or even before the first date. BUT...let's say I was a more traditional sort.
How soon is too soon to start the discussion on your sexual proclivities? For instance, I once went on a date with a guy who asked me if I like anal. On the first date. I was kind of unsure how to answer that one as I've never had someone ask me outright like that. Needless to say, we did not have a second date and I've always wondered if it was because I was unwilling to address my willingness (or unwillingness) to be sexually adventuresome.
In my opinion, if you're doing the traditional dating thing, discussing ones likes or dislikes between the sheets is a little premature on the first date. If you're lips haven't locked with mine I would rather not tell you what goes on when I spread my legs. Hell, you may never have the chance to find out so probably you should work on the whole build up (foreplay if you will) before you decide to get straight to business. Let me tell you, you asking me if I like anal, if I'll give you a blow job or telling me you want to cum in my face is not endearing you to me. And it is definitely not upping your chances of ever finding out first hand what I like. Whether I want those things or not, it shows to me you're not looking for a relationship, you're looking for a sex toy.
On the other hand, maybe you're asking because you're very sexual and you need to know if I am, too. I can see you not wanting to waste your time on someone who would turn their nose up on what brings you pleasure. But again, I just am not sure asking someone that on the first date is really the way to go. And what if I say no to anal because I've never had anyone ask me to do that with them? Then you could be missing out on something because you're thinking if I haven't done it I wouldn't be interested.
What are your thoughts? Have you been asked what your sexual preferences are on the first date? When is the appropriate time to start asking those questions?
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
And so the waiting begins...
The worst thing about dating in my humble, I-don't-go-on-dates opinion is the waiting. I hate the day (or days) after when you wonder what the fuck is coming next. So much anxiety.
And of course, you end up breaking down the date and analyzing ever word, look or action the other person made to try to determine if their interest in you has waned. In the course of doing this, you decide you are too fat, too ugly, too stupid, too everything they aren't looking for in a girlfriend. Then you start kicking yourself for the outfit you wore, the way you laughed, what you said and wondering what you could have done differently.
Its enough to make a girl wanna be a nun. Speaking of nuns, Oprah had those bitches on TV and I caught the syndicated version over the summer and she did not ask them if they...well, masturbate and imagine God while doing so. I mean, they are married to him for God's sake. Or Jesus. Ohhhh maybe they imagine both, is that cheating? Or maybe I should just go back to dating backwards. At least then I got action.
Anyway, the point is I have now convinced myself The Commercial Banker is not interested in me as anything more than a friend and I am actually really bummed about it.
Never. Dating. Again.
He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not...
When It Rains It Pours...
No, I'm not talking about Golden Showers (ummm fucking EWWWWW).
Instead I'm talking about the fact that I was on a date last night with the Commercial Banker and I had 4 phone calls and 5 texts during which two guys proceeded to ask me out.
Talk about AWKWARD.
The Commercial Banker and I have the same damn phone and ringtone, so every time it went off we were both like whose is it. Then when his phone went off he just assumed it was mine. At one point he joked I was going to HAVE to answer it sometime.
Thank GOD I didn't!
The only good thing about it is I'm not remotely interested in either of them. The bad thing is I'm not remotely interested in either of them. I hate telling people no.
Instead I'm talking about the fact that I was on a date last night with the Commercial Banker and I had 4 phone calls and 5 texts during which two guys proceeded to ask me out.
Talk about AWKWARD.
The Commercial Banker and I have the same damn phone and ringtone, so every time it went off we were both like whose is it. Then when his phone went off he just assumed it was mine. At one point he joked I was going to HAVE to answer it sometime.
Thank GOD I didn't!
The only good thing about it is I'm not remotely interested in either of them. The bad thing is I'm not remotely interested in either of them. I hate telling people no.
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Pick-Up Lines part uno
I just stumbled across a book from Maxim (weird, who knew their subscribers could actually read) in my Dad’s bathroom and I just had to steal it to share with you. Side note: calling it a book is being generous. It’s like 20 pages stapled together with a laminated cover. And it’s from 2000 so you know it’s gonna be good.
Maxim’s Put-downs, Pranks & Pick-Up Lines is actually a bit of a letdown but since I know we’ve all been wondering where the boys out there get their lame-o pickup lines, I thought I should share the answer. The male version of Cosmopolitan magazine (in fact, published by the same publishing company and they share deets back and forth at an alarming rate) is just as misinformed as its female counterpart. Before I share these horrendous pick-up lines, please note the Senior Writer for this gem is a woman.
1. “Can I be your slave on your next day off?”
2. “Aren’t there any child labor laws in this business? What are you, 14?”
3. “You look like the Statue of Liberty holding that tray way up high. Can I call you Liberty? Hell, can I call you?”
4. “Your boyfriend is the luckiest man in the world. But are you happy? Call me.”
5. “I’m Steve. Have you ever dated a Steve?”
6. “If you were a booger I’d pick you first.”
7. Him: “Where you talking to me?” Her: “No.” Him: “Oh. Would you please start?”
8. “This tastes almost as good as you look.”
9. “Hey, we have something in common. I’m rich and you’re beautiful.” (Recommended for guys named Rich).
10. “Does your boyfriend tell you how beautiful you are every day? ‘Cause if he doesn’t, I will!”
Ummm, it should also be noted they asked three bartenders to track pick-up lines used on them in the course of 3 weeks. Clearly some of these are situational. I give Maxim props for recognizing they are so bad but not for tacking on they’re good as an afterthought.
What’s the best pick-up line you’ve ever gotten?
Maxim’s Put-downs, Pranks & Pick-Up Lines is actually a bit of a letdown but since I know we’ve all been wondering where the boys out there get their lame-o pickup lines, I thought I should share the answer. The male version of Cosmopolitan magazine (in fact, published by the same publishing company and they share deets back and forth at an alarming rate) is just as misinformed as its female counterpart. Before I share these horrendous pick-up lines, please note the Senior Writer for this gem is a woman.
1. “Can I be your slave on your next day off?”
2. “Aren’t there any child labor laws in this business? What are you, 14?”
3. “You look like the Statue of Liberty holding that tray way up high. Can I call you Liberty? Hell, can I call you?”
4. “Your boyfriend is the luckiest man in the world. But are you happy? Call me.”
5. “I’m Steve. Have you ever dated a Steve?”
6. “If you were a booger I’d pick you first.”
7. Him: “Where you talking to me?” Her: “No.” Him: “Oh. Would you please start?”
8. “This tastes almost as good as you look.”
9. “Hey, we have something in common. I’m rich and you’re beautiful.” (Recommended for guys named Rich).
10. “Does your boyfriend tell you how beautiful you are every day? ‘Cause if he doesn’t, I will!”
Ummm, it should also be noted they asked three bartenders to track pick-up lines used on them in the course of 3 weeks. Clearly some of these are situational. I give Maxim props for recognizing they are so bad but not for tacking on they’re good as an afterthought.
What’s the best pick-up line you’ve ever gotten?
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Old Emails Are the Jam
So you know how sometimes you make bad decisions with a specific someone and people start to question the status of those decisions? That's what this delicious email I found in my archives is about..
From: E's very professional email
To: D's very professional email; K's very professional email
Subject: Reasons He and I are NOT dating...
Since every time I talk to the 2 of you, you seem convinced HE and I are dating I have decided to compile a list of reasons we are NOT in fact dating. Mainly because I don't feel like working but also because, well, we aren't dating.
1. Married Mope on a Wednesday night in my FACE.
2. He told D I was a "good friend".
3. He has never actually asked me on a date. That's kind of a big deal.
4. He shaved his chest for the first time since I have known him in anticipation of heading to South Carolina for the weekend. Obviously he plans on mope slaying this weekend which would explain why he keeps acting like I shouldn't be going to SC.
5. One minute he's affectionate and the next he acts like he doesn't even know me. That's just weird.
6. He actually sometimes mentions that he is a mope slayer to me. Like I should be impressed.
I think those are pretty solid reasons. The shaving the chest thing is kind of weird to me for some reason. Let me know your thoughts.
From: K's very professional email
Sent: Thursday, September 11, 2008 9:29 AM
To: E's very professional email
Cc: D's very professional email
Subject: Re: Reasons He and I are NOT dating...
1. That was retarted but he seriously did it b/c he may have been wanting you to stop him....hince the long pause....etc...
2. D knows better
3. He picked you up, paid, etc....ALL 25 yr old adults know what a date is
4. Really??
5. He's moody
6. Has this been witnessed??? D???
From: D's very professional email
To: K's very professional email; E's very professional email
Sent: Sep 11, 2008 09:39:57 AM
Subject: RE: Reasons He and I are NOT dating...
1. yeah E….why didn’t you stop him?
2. I think you are just making things up. I don’t remember him telling me that
3. good point K
4. this nothing to do with you and him, but I just lost all respect for him because of the chest thing.
5. moody when sober so keep him loaded
6. all lies. He must have been high when he told you that
From: E's very professional email
Sent: Thursday, September 11, 2008 9:46 AM
To: K's very professional email; D's very profesional email
Subject: RE: Reasons He and I are NOT dating...
1. Why is it my job to stop him? Shouldn't he respect me enough NOT to even want to do that in my presence? Or even at all come to think of it.
2. D you told me that when you were in town. You might have been saying that to try to hook up with me though. You know you wanted to. I'm sorry you had to settle for Scooby.
3. I don't like your point K. I don't like you agreeing with K, D.
4. REALLY! I was sitting in his room yesterday thinking it was taking him entirely too long to get ready for a softball game and he was in there shaving his chest hair. I know this because there is chest hair all over the sink now and because I woke up this morning and he has no chest hair anymore. I think that is weird and I am glad D has lot respect for him due to his primping. 5. I can't keep him loaded ALL the time. Trust me I've tried!
6. I have never been with him when he has gotten high so that is not possible.
From: D's very professional email
To: E's very professional email; K's very professional email
Sent: Sep 11, 2008 10:07:40 AM
Subject: RE: Reasons He and I are NOT dating...
Sorry Erin, I don’t hook up with my friend’s girlfriend. It’s a rule
From: E's very professional email
Sent: Thursday, September 11, 2008 10:11 AM
To: K's very professional email; D's very professional email
Subject: RE: Reasons He and I are NOT dating...
I am not and never have been his girlfriend so that point is moot. I'm glad that's a rule though. I have much respect for you now. I like how that is the only point you felt a need to clarify.
AND...this just occurred to me. PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD TRY NOT TO DISCUSS OUR LAST PHONE CALL WITH THE TWO GAYEST BOBS EVER WHEN YOU ARE BLACKOUT THIS WEEKEND. Seriously. Please.
From: D's very professional email
Sent: 09/11/2008 10:19 AM
To: E's very professional email; K's very professional email
SubjectRE: Reasons He and I are NOT dating...
Are ya’ll coming to the big city this weekend?
From: K's very professional email
To: D's very professional email
Cc: E's very professional email
Sent: Sep 11, 2008 10:23:21 AM
Subject: RE: Reasons He and I are NOT dating...
I am not, E????????????????????
From: E's very professional email
Sent: 09/11/2008 10:36 AM
To: K's very professional email; D's very professional email
SubjectRE: Reasons He and I are NOT dating...
I have not decided whether or not I am heading there. No ticket, place to stay etc. Though I feel like I got a BILLION calls last night telling me I need to just wing it and head that way after work. But it's one thing to wing staying over in Athens for the weekend and another to do it in Columbia. And D you didn't promise me you'd keep your mouth shut...
From: K's very professional email
Sent: Thursday, September 11, 2008 10:50 AM
To: E's very professional email
Cc: D's very professional email
Subject: RE: Reasons He and I are NOT dating...
I am partial to you staying here so you can hang out w me at Corts...but I also want you go and be w him...he needs you for support right now (whether he says it or not). I am worried about him holding all this in......he could really make some bad decisions- and you know that you can stay w C or whatever
From: D's very professional email
To: K's very professional email; E's very professional email
Sent: Sep 11, 2008 11:07:35 AM
Subject: RE: Reasons He and I are NOT dating...
I’ll keep him in line! Staying with C seems like a really good option for you Erin. Didn’t you hook up with him last weekend or something??????
From: E's very professional email
To: D's very professional email; K's very professional email
Subject: Reasons He and I are NOT dating...
Since every time I talk to the 2 of you, you seem convinced HE and I are dating I have decided to compile a list of reasons we are NOT in fact dating. Mainly because I don't feel like working but also because, well, we aren't dating.
1. Married Mope on a Wednesday night in my FACE.
2. He told D I was a "good friend".
3. He has never actually asked me on a date. That's kind of a big deal.
4. He shaved his chest for the first time since I have known him in anticipation of heading to South Carolina for the weekend. Obviously he plans on mope slaying this weekend which would explain why he keeps acting like I shouldn't be going to SC.
5. One minute he's affectionate and the next he acts like he doesn't even know me. That's just weird.
6. He actually sometimes mentions that he is a mope slayer to me. Like I should be impressed.
I think those are pretty solid reasons. The shaving the chest thing is kind of weird to me for some reason. Let me know your thoughts.
From: K's very professional email
Sent: Thursday, September 11, 2008 9:29 AM
To: E's very professional email
Cc: D's very professional email
Subject: Re: Reasons He and I are NOT dating...
1. That was retarted but he seriously did it b/c he may have been wanting you to stop him....hince the long pause....etc...
2. D knows better
3. He picked you up, paid, etc....ALL 25 yr old adults know what a date is
4. Really??
5. He's moody
6. Has this been witnessed??? D???
From: D's very professional email
To: K's very professional email; E's very professional email
Sent: Sep 11, 2008 09:39:57 AM
Subject: RE: Reasons He and I are NOT dating...
1. yeah E….why didn’t you stop him?
2. I think you are just making things up. I don’t remember him telling me that
3. good point K
4. this nothing to do with you and him, but I just lost all respect for him because of the chest thing.
5. moody when sober so keep him loaded
6. all lies. He must have been high when he told you that
From: E's very professional email
Sent: Thursday, September 11, 2008 9:46 AM
To: K's very professional email; D's very profesional email
Subject: RE: Reasons He and I are NOT dating...
1. Why is it my job to stop him? Shouldn't he respect me enough NOT to even want to do that in my presence? Or even at all come to think of it.
2. D you told me that when you were in town. You might have been saying that to try to hook up with me though. You know you wanted to. I'm sorry you had to settle for Scooby.
3. I don't like your point K. I don't like you agreeing with K, D.
4. REALLY! I was sitting in his room yesterday thinking it was taking him entirely too long to get ready for a softball game and he was in there shaving his chest hair. I know this because there is chest hair all over the sink now and because I woke up this morning and he has no chest hair anymore. I think that is weird and I am glad D has lot respect for him due to his primping. 5. I can't keep him loaded ALL the time. Trust me I've tried!
6. I have never been with him when he has gotten high so that is not possible.
From: D's very professional email
To: E's very professional email; K's very professional email
Sent: Sep 11, 2008 10:07:40 AM
Subject: RE: Reasons He and I are NOT dating...
Sorry Erin, I don’t hook up with my friend’s girlfriend. It’s a rule
From: E's very professional email
Sent: Thursday, September 11, 2008 10:11 AM
To: K's very professional email; D's very professional email
Subject: RE: Reasons He and I are NOT dating...
I am not and never have been his girlfriend so that point is moot. I'm glad that's a rule though. I have much respect for you now. I like how that is the only point you felt a need to clarify.
AND...this just occurred to me. PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD TRY NOT TO DISCUSS OUR LAST PHONE CALL WITH THE TWO GAYEST BOBS EVER WHEN YOU ARE BLACKOUT THIS WEEKEND. Seriously. Please.
From: D's very professional email
Sent: 09/11/2008 10:19 AM
To: E's very professional email; K's very professional email
SubjectRE: Reasons He and I are NOT dating...
Are ya’ll coming to the big city this weekend?
From: K's very professional email
To: D's very professional email
Cc: E's very professional email
Sent: Sep 11, 2008 10:23:21 AM
Subject: RE: Reasons He and I are NOT dating...
I am not, E????????????????????
From: E's very professional email
Sent: 09/11/2008 10:36 AM
To: K's very professional email; D's very professional email
SubjectRE: Reasons He and I are NOT dating...
I have not decided whether or not I am heading there. No ticket, place to stay etc. Though I feel like I got a BILLION calls last night telling me I need to just wing it and head that way after work. But it's one thing to wing staying over in Athens for the weekend and another to do it in Columbia. And D you didn't promise me you'd keep your mouth shut...
From: K's very professional email
Sent: Thursday, September 11, 2008 10:50 AM
To: E's very professional email
Cc: D's very professional email
Subject: RE: Reasons He and I are NOT dating...
I am partial to you staying here so you can hang out w me at Corts...but I also want you go and be w him...he needs you for support right now (whether he says it or not). I am worried about him holding all this in......he could really make some bad decisions- and you know that you can stay w C or whatever
From: D's very professional email
To: K's very professional email; E's very professional email
Sent: Sep 11, 2008 11:07:35 AM
Subject: RE: Reasons He and I are NOT dating...
I’ll keep him in line! Staying with C seems like a really good option for you Erin. Didn’t you hook up with him last weekend or something??????
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
SWF seeks SWM
Lately, I think everyone is coupling off. In fact, I have had to seek out new single friends to hang out with (or at least friends who spend a great deal of time away from their significant others). It doesn't matter how gooey you and your soul mate are, I will always feel like the extra person prohibiting you from getting your groove on. Always, and don't tell me not to feel that way because it is not your place to do so.
Sometimes, people try to bring an extra guy along like I don't know they are secretly hoping we hit it off and we can all double date forever and ever. While I appreciate your attempts, really, I am so ridiculously awkward that you are just wasting your time. I will mess it up somehow. For example, I might talk about that guy I am dating but not dating. Every story I tell might involve him in some way to the point that even when I see this great guy you tried to couple me up with outside of this event, he will ask about that person. Or I will eat faster than him. That's right (I know this turns you on) I eat like a man. I used to be ashamed of it but honestly, I have tried to change it. I just can't. Or I will make fun of him in a Jersey way. He will not get it. I will be labeled a bitch. So really, don't waste your time.
And if you are a guy and you happen to enjoy my company, I will go ahead and tell you I had no idea and if I upset you I'm sorry. I will say I do not think I have met the one yet so you should probably find someone else to moon over. The closest I have come to meeting The One is not interested in that with me. Not that I won't try my damnedest to change his mind in the future if I am still single.
So since so many people have offered to set me up (or been sneaky about it) I have decided it might be time to consider what I want in a MAN- not a boy a MAN. I wish you could hear me say that. It would really enhance this blog. That being said...this Single, White, Average and totally batshit crazy female is seeking:
Sometimes, people try to bring an extra guy along like I don't know they are secretly hoping we hit it off and we can all double date forever and ever. While I appreciate your attempts, really, I am so ridiculously awkward that you are just wasting your time. I will mess it up somehow. For example, I might talk about that guy I am dating but not dating. Every story I tell might involve him in some way to the point that even when I see this great guy you tried to couple me up with outside of this event, he will ask about that person. Or I will eat faster than him. That's right (I know this turns you on) I eat like a man. I used to be ashamed of it but honestly, I have tried to change it. I just can't. Or I will make fun of him in a Jersey way. He will not get it. I will be labeled a bitch. So really, don't waste your time.
And if you are a guy and you happen to enjoy my company, I will go ahead and tell you I had no idea and if I upset you I'm sorry. I will say I do not think I have met the one yet so you should probably find someone else to moon over. The closest I have come to meeting The One is not interested in that with me. Not that I won't try my damnedest to change his mind in the future if I am still single.
So since so many people have offered to set me up (or been sneaky about it) I have decided it might be time to consider what I want in a MAN- not a boy a MAN. I wish you could hear me say that. It would really enhance this blog. That being said...this Single, White, Average and totally batshit crazy female is seeking:
- A Male. A real male. Not one of those things that pretends to be male. If you wear pink, get manicures and will watch chick flicks with me then we are not meant to be together. I do my weepy, girl movies alone thank you very much.
- Athletic. No skateboarding does not count as athletic. I want a guy who plays on a softball team after work. Or his work is to play a sport. Top three sports my guy can play: Baseball, Football and Golf. Yum.
- Smart. You don't have to be smarter than me (not that it would be hard to do) but I am looking for a guy who can read, write and do some math. In fact, if you are good with finances that would be HUGE.
- Sense of Humor. Seriously, if you don't like The Office, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, anything with Will Ferrell, Summer Heights High, My Name is Earl...well I could go on but it would take forever. If you don't like raunchy humor, don't bother. The word penis still makes me laugh.
- Sports. Not a sports guy? Get outta here. I don't care what teams you like, just that you have passion for a team. You can learn when you meet me who my teams are. I won't hate you for your choices but I will heckle you.
- Attractive. Don't tell me someone's looks don't matter because they do trust me. I recently saw an ex who I still had feelings for. He was fat. My feelings are gone. I don't think it's wrong of me to admit that I care what someone looks like. I'm sure plenty of guys have passed on me because I weigh more than they would prefer. Whatever. Do I have a type? Yes. Tall ( 6'0" is the minimum. I dated a 6'7" guy one time. It was difficult but fun), dark ( I like brunettes. My one encounter with a blond was a nightmare. I think it scarred me), green or brown eyes (The blond was blue eyed too...hmmm), athletic build ( you can have a bit of pudge but I like a guy who hits the gym and TRIES to maintain a physique of some type).
- Outgoing. Social. Likes to party. I should probably look for someone who doesn't drink and can babysit me but that would be boring. So someone who enjoys flip cup and beer pong and would want to do those things with me!
I don't think this list is too choosy though it certainly excludes a fair number of people. If you are offended...too bad. You'll get over it. My sparkling personality will sway you!
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