Monday Musings

• Moving is a bitch. No really, a bitch. Unpacking is the worst.
• My alma mater is the number one party school. Clearly the voters missed the Miley Cyrus ripoff orientation video in the previous post. WTF is that?
• Why is furniture so fucking expensive? How do poor people furnish their apartments?
• Apparently, if you hit enter in the wrong spot, this will post without being completed. So if you follow in google reader or something, check back for updates. Whoops.
• I can't get internet until fucking Friday. So this will be a boring week. Guess I could unpack all my shit.
• A company I sent my resume to a while back just sent me a job posting for a part time Account Coordinator. Which sounds like a cool gig except for that whole part time thing. Because the job posting says 75% travel. I can't live off a part time gig so I'd need a second job which would be IMPOSSIBLE if I was traveling. How the hell can anyone take a part time gig that involves 75% travel? It doesn't even make sense.
• I feel like I need to hit enter after each bullet so it updates in your reader. Thus elongating the process of posting. Which is already long since I have to wait for shit to come to me. The brain is not functioning today.
• Homeslice and Clearly. Two words I have been using entirely too much. Can't stop. Won't stop.
• I wish I had honed in on a marketable talent back in high school. So I could have put the hard work in on Mommy's tab as opposed to my own. Also, I wish life was like the movies and I could be Jenna Dewan in Step Up- girl has skillz and ends up with Channing Tatum. Wait, was this real life or a movie?
• I just thought of a funny story. But it seems like it should be put in its own blog post. So hopefully I remember that later otherwise, you'll never see it.
• Eric Church just emailed me. Okay, not him actually, but his people. He has a new video coming out. SAY WHAT!?!?!?! I will be tuning in Friday, homeslice. Don't you worry. If you don't know who Eric Church is...we're gonna have a problem being friends. Just so you know.
• I got accused of being on a Roid Rage Saturday night. Made more ironic by the fact that the person who made the accusation, is the one who started the events that unfolded. Also, funny is the fact that he absolutely refuses to acknowledge that the other person was in the wrong. Also, since when is ignoring someone who is blatantly talkin shit about you while you are standing right there a Roid Rage? And, while we're on the topic, stop trying to deflect everyone's interest onto me from the fact that you were holding hands with said person WHILE IN THE SAME ROOM AS YOUR GIRLFRIEND. Who was 10x more pissed off than I was. Roid Rant over.
• Why do I think it is more acceptable to blog at work than look for a new job at work?
• The bad thing about blogging at work is that work gets in the way plus I cannot link to anything since it's all blocked. So blogging this week will BLOW. Just skip on over to next week folks.

Monday Musings

• I added a new blogger to the site. I don't know why since I only have two public readers and she is one of them. But one day when this site takes off, she'll be so grateful for the opportunity I provided her. Or not. But whatever.
• I'm reading Google Blogger for Dummies. Hopefully, this improves the quality of the site. But probably not.
• My friend Kyle got me a Table Topics gift for my birthday. Why am I bringing this up now? Well, he just gave it to me last night. Hellooooo, belated. But then, I have been pretty MIA with that group of friends lately. Anyway, it would be great for when I have people over but I’m thinking of drawing one card a week or whenever I feel like it and blogging the responses. Then you will REALLLLLYYYYY get to know how boring I am. Thoughts?
• Tim Tebow commercial. Thoughts? When it came on last night, everyone rushed to the table to grab more food because we thought it would be some commercial no one gave a shit about. Imagine our surprise when Saint Timmy tackled his mom. Had I not been wedged between the wall and the couch with no ability to move, I would have missed it. As it was, I had tuned out whatever his mom said. So her pro-life commercial turned into a pro-abortion commercial with that dive bomb. I mean why raise a kid if he’s just going to tackle you on television?
• I am feeling particularly blank today. Empty almost.
• Where the hell was Miller Lite last night? Am I the only one who noticed they had ZERO commercials? Or maybe I just missed them… Bud Light and Doritos single handedly funded the Super Bowl broadcast with their commercials. And they were the best.
• While we are on the subject of super bowl ads… there is a new e*trade baby in town and I do not like him. At all. ANNND godaddy.com needs to hire a new marketing/ad firm stat. Does anyone ever actually go to the site to see the girls? As my friend Alex put it last night, “Unless I’m seeing some nipple, it’s not worth my time.”
• When someone emails me that they just got back from church or are reading proverbs I want to immediately say something that will send me straight to hell. It’s like I’m trying to balance out their goodness with my evilness.
• This. I want to do this. Except to the industrial scanner in my office that thinks it’s funny to claim I have misfed the paper randomly and intermittently while I’m trying to send people their work. 500 pages of work should not take an hour to scan to email.
• Dear body, when I overindulge on the weekends you will be properly punished on Monday. As in, you can complain about how hungry you are all you want but I’m not putting anything in you. Except water. A banana. And oatmeal. And I will workout for 3 hours. You should really have a conversation with the alcoholic side of me and find out how to remedy this.
• I wish someone would buy me everything on the It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia website. And the UGA Playbook which should be coming out this summer. I’d like to outfit my home.
• I lied. I just drank decaf coffee. Strangely, my hunger pangs are gone. New diet?
  With insurance companies, a doctor’s office may bill $21,000 worth of services. $12,000 of it ends up written off and the insurance company pays out $9,000. I don’t understand the math of that. Apparently, insurance companies only ALLOW you to bill so much per service and then has the right to say of that service how much they will pay. I work with insurance and I still don’t get it. No wonder obama wants to change it.
• I don't know why I think you would care about the above bullet. But I'm too lazy to delete it.
• Getting your shit together is an overwhelming task. I don’t even know where to start taking baby steps.
• Why does my blackberry think that curse words are just misspelled? They aren’t. I fucking like them and wish you would stop making me ignore the dashed lines below them. I know what the hell I’m writing and I’m okay with it. Damnit.
• I want chocolate.....in my mouth....NOW.