STOP! IN THE NAME OF LOVE!

Couple of things:
1. The Stop sign knows what is up.
2. She could fit a lot more than a cell phone in there.
3. She is unaware that the veil she is wearing is see through. "Oh no one will see me if I answer this text real quick!"
4. Who the fuck is texting her that is important enough for her to be responding? Shouldn't they BE AT THE WEDDING IF THEY MATTER THAT MUCH?!?!
5. The lack of balls on this guy is appalling. I hope he uses this video in the divorce proceedings.

Vagina Vagina Vagina

The sign to the left. Kirk is just too easy of a target.

Twitter Tuesday.

I am bringing back an oldie that the real owner of this blog has not done recently {in her defense I don't think she has done much of anything unrelated to work lately}. I found this individual as I was laying in bed last night and I am a HUGE fan.  Allow me to introduce you to @cubicletweets and here are a few of my favorites....

• I would transfer you to her voicemail but then I have to press like two buttons and then talk to someone and I just don't want to do that.
• Since the water cooler is broken, I just might die of dehydration and lack of office gossip.
• I am only 2 hours into the 46 hour work week and I already want to shoot myself
• i think i just had a cubicle induced panic attack. that's grounds for going home right?
• my phone is about to die. they're are annoying people in costumes everywhere. i need a cigarette. i'm sick. i can't drink. i hate my life
• I'm using @foursquare for the first time and it says my office isn't showing up as a location. My search term is Hell. Can anyone help me?
• You know that urban legend about the dog in the microwave? Yeah that's what the microwave in our fucking office looks like.
•    My fucking desk is fucking stressing me out.
•    This office is a cesspool of disease and bad fashion.
• You have been talking about apple pie for 34 minutes. I've been timing you. Its been 34 fucking minutes. Now 35. 35 minutes
•    i don't want to hear about your vacation. actually, i don't even want to hear you talk.
• a bird just landed on a tree outside my window, looked at me and then took off and i thought to myself, "you lucky son of a bitch."
•    i really didn't think it was possible for me to hate something more than Monday, but Tuesday, you're really making progress
• The last 5 minutes of the work week has got to be similar to water boarding at Guantanamo Bay.

I really could go on for awhile, but I will stop.  And no, this in no way reflects how I feel about my job... I just found him/her to be entertaining

I'm Not Enough

Soooo... I've been following a few blogs now and I suddenly came to the realization that I am simply not ENOUGH. I know you think my self esteem has taken a hit but honestly, some people are deep and some people are funny. I think I can be both but it is not translating to this blog for some reason.

I think when I try to be deep I come across as whining about something. I don't like whiners. I like whining. Which is completely hypocritical. Which is something else I hate. I think I may actually hate myself if I became friend's with myself. How deep is that?

When I try to be funny, I curse too much, I laugh too loud and I try to hard. I think it is evident. Despite graduating from UGA with a degree in journalism, I don't think my strength is in writing. I believe it may be in story telling. In person, I am pretty entertaining (just ask the bachelorette party I went to last weekend).

Also, how funny is a drunk? I think if you are going to be a drunk, you can't really be deep. I mean you can but you can't because no one will listen to you and everyone will call you crazy.

I have come to the conclusion that to be a part of a blog you have to choose a hole and become that peg (which to me sounds so DIRTY but to others might sound deep). You really do have to pick one facet of yourself and stick with it. I am too indecisive. If someone reviewed my blog or even my life they would say I skip around and I can't pick a theme, a personality, a style or even a path to follow. I feel as though I should apologize for it but I feel as though I shouldn't.

I don't even know what I was trying to say with this blog. And rather than making me feel better, I think it has just depressed me. Time for a glass of wine.